Jokes - General medicine

Total No. of Records - 50
Page 3 of 5

The wait to reduce weight

Submitted By: | Current Rating: 3.5
A young bride was weeping on the phone to her mother. " I can't stand my husband any more. He's got such a nasty disposition. He's made me so nervous , I'm losing my weight." "Then why don't you leave him?" asked her mother.
" I'm going to" said the bride." I'm just waiting until he gets me down to 129 pounds!!" ...

The test of true friendship

Submitted By: | Current Rating: 1
Mr. Peter to doctor : " Doc , I'm heading up to rattlesnake country and i figure I better get a bit of advice on what to do incase i get bitten by a rattlesnake."...

Improvisation a help at times

Submitted By: | Current Rating: 1
No amount of coaxing would persuade a 16 month old boy to take his medicine in any shape or form. His mother gave up and left the room in utter disgust. When she came back, she starred in amazement for there stood her son gleefully opening his mouth for it. Her husband had solved the problem by mixing the medicine with orange juice , putting it into a water pistol and shooting it into his mouth !!...

Confidence

Submitted By: | Current Rating: 1
"The patient was worried. "Are you sure it's pneumonia, doctor?" he asked, "I've heard of cases where a doctor treated a patient for pneumonia, and he ended up dying for something else." ...

Round trip

Submitted By: | Current Rating: 2
A doctor told an insomnia sufferer, "Take one of these pills. You'll not only sleep tonight but you'll take a trip. You'll wake up in Paris."...

Different Interpretation

Submitted By: | Current Rating: 1
A young lady went to a doctor to find a remedy to her nervous condition. She listened attentively as the doctor explained. "Madam," he said, "you require frequent baths, plenty of fresh air; also you should dress in warm clothes."...

Rest Cure

Submitted By: | Current Rating: 1
A man asked his doctor quite frankly what was wrong with him. "Well," said the doctor, "you eat too much, drink too much, and you are terribly lazy."...

Unique diagnostic test

Submitted By: | Current Rating: 5.3
A man was very worried that his wife was lately not quite the same as she used to be. So, he takes her to the doctor who runs a battery of tests on her and then calls the man into his office. ...